


The Music Of My Life

by Miss_Sarcastix



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: But it's literally just Jisung's thoughts, Drabble, Gen, Han Jisung | Han-centric, Happy Birthday Han Jisung, How Do I Tag, Mentioned Stray Kids Ensemble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-10-18 11:00:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20638076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Sarcastix/pseuds/Miss_Sarcastix
Summary: It takes Jisung being in another country altogether for him to realize how important music is to him.





	The Music Of My Life

**Author's Note:**

> Title a courtesy of dawnbreak55 ~ I love you thank you so much ghjk ~ This is a fairly short drabble written for Jisung's birthday and I'm marginally satisfied with how it turned out,,, kinda,,, I hope you enjoy! ~ Happy Birthday Jisung!

It takes Jisung being in another country altogether for him to realize how important music is to him. It isn’t that he  _ hates _ the country he’s moved to. He has friends, the food is good, he has a favorite mall, his school isn’t  _ horrendous _ , and yet there are moments that he can’t help but wonder where he belongs. His words are muddled, Korean at home, English at school and there’s Malay and Chinese and Tamil surrounding the areas he walks in. Sometimes he doesn’t feel Korean enough. But he certainly doesn’t belong in this country. So what does that make him? Confused, he decides.

Sometimes the lessons were easy and sometimes they were hard. But as long as he had his headphones, he knew he’d be okay. For now. Because the music could keep him company. The music felt like home. Even if he no longer knew how to define home. Somewhere in between school and people and listening to music he began to write music too. First some random lyrics in the margins of his notebooks and then soon he had bought himself a notebook just to spill his words into. And maybe he was still figuring out who he was and where he belonged, but the verses and rhythms were sometimes the only way he could express himself. 

The words tend to flow easier in Korean than English (although there might be an odd sentence or few) and he starts looking into more and more artists from his home. His first home. His decision isn’t made on a whim, he has concerns and worries and he tosses in his bed for many nights before he finally approaches his parents. He wants to do music. He  _ needs _ to do music. But there was no future for him in music where he was. He had to leave. He wanted to go back. Go to Korea. 

He bargains and works and studies to prove that he’s capable of doing it. And finally he strikes a deal with his parents and then he’s on a flight. He lands in Korea and it’s the same and yet different. But getting reacquainted with Korea was a far easier task than getting into the music industry. He goes with friends to auditions upon auditions before they decide to go for one in JYP just for the hell of it. By some miracle of chance, Jisung makes it in. He wants to celebrate everything right in the moment but he knows that he isn’t done yet. He’s still got to make it out in the world.

He will forever be glad that he met the people that he did in that stroke of luck. He’s putting out actual mixtapes with two other trainees and Jisung can start to see his dreams fall into place. He keeps working and working and he butts heads with some people but he keeps moving. Then he’s in a survival show and there’s pressure and excitement and  _ loss _ and never had Jisung cried as much as he had for the friends that he’d nearly lost in the competition. It’s then that parts of him began to settle. The realization of the things that matter to him and the future he wants and the people he wants it with. He’s still learning who he is but it’s becoming clearer.

Finally he’s able to debut. He made it. And he did it with the people he wanted to do it with. And he knows where he belongs. He belongs on stage. He belongs with these people. He belongs with music. Where he can express his thoughts, his feelings and his struggles, for himself and for people like him. People who need this music as much as he did. As much as he still does and as much as he always will.  


**Author's Note:**

> So I obviously won't know exactly how Jisung felt about Malaysia so most of what I'd written in the beginning is based on my own experiences growing up here in Malaysia as a mixed culture person??? and I'd sort of based it off of that and I hope it didn't come off too weird?? anyway I hope you enjoyed!! Let me know what you think!!! <33333


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